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Is “How-NOT-To” More Powerful Than How To?

Author: Sean D'Souza


Three Month Vacation:Online Business Podcast

When we're writing a book, creating a workshop or giving a presentation, we go hurtling down the path of HOW-TO.

Except it seems that HOW-To is only part of the picture. We're missing out on a crucial element, which is why our clients get confused.

Learn how to use the HOW-NOT-To in your online and offline marketing and training.

http://traffic.libsyn.com/psychotactics/034_TheImportance_Of_How_Not_To2.mp3
Right click and ‘save as' to download


So how do you use HOW-NOT-To in your online and offline marketing and training

Today I was at the café as usual. As I'm paying the bill, the guy, he knows I'm writing the book on pricing and he says, “Well, why is it taking you so long.” I said, “Well, it's because I'm not just writing ‘how to', but I'm writing ‘how not to‘.” He lifts his eyebrows like people often do when they don't really want to ask you a question but the question is on their mind, so I feel compelled to answer the question.

That's what we're going to cover in today's episode.

We're going to see how ‘how to' is more an intellectual thing and ‘how not' to is more instructional, and why both of them combined make such a potent weapon when you're teaching something, and also when you're learning it.

I don't know if you've ever heard of the water test.

Now the water test is a test that you do to figure out if the frying pan is at the right temperature. Often when we're cooking, what we'll do is we'll take a frying pan and we'll put some oil on it. Then the oil will start to heat up and then we'll put some chicken in it. The chicken or the fish, it sticks to the pan. Now that only happens because the pan is not at the right temperature or the oil is not at the right temperature.

I was watching this video online and they were showing me how to figure out the right temperature. What you have to do is you take a little water and you drop it on the pan. If it goes vsshhhhhh, then the pan is not hot enough. Of course you go through many of these, until at one point it's magic. The water droplet just rolls in the pan as if it were a blob of mercury. At that precise moment you put the oil in the pan and then immediately after that the chicken or the fish, and it doesn't stick.

Here's what I did. I took the pan, I followed the instructions, and no matter how many times I tried to get that water test to work, and it just wouldn't work for me. I'm pretty persistent. I went at it quite a while and the pan was in danger of getting burnt, but I still wasn't having any success with it. 




This doesn't make any sense, because when you think about it, I had the instructions. I should have been able to get it right but I wasn't getting it right.

In this episode we'll cover three things as always.

  • The first thing is the importance of ‘how not to' vs. just ‘how to'.
  • The second is why ‘how not to' works.
  • The third is when to bring it in. What's the right time to bring it in?

Let's start off with the first topic, which is ‘how not to'. What is it and why is it so important?

Let's go back to my frying pan. There I was with the frying pan trying to get the water test to work, but it wouldn't work. The reason why it wasn't working was because in the video they had a stainless steel frying pan and I had a non-stick. Now you might think that makes perfect sense. You're such an idiot. You should have seen it was a stainless steel one. They would have even mentioned take a stainless steel frying pan.

But when you're encountering something it's like learning a new language. You're just struggling at so many levels that it's easy to have this blind spot, to have many blind spots in fact. You're so focused on trying to get it right, not to goof up, that eventually you do goof up.

That's because ‘how to' is an intellectual process.

It might seem like how to are the steps. You're doing one step, the second step, the third step.

But if you've ever sat in an audience when a presenter is talking about, say, search engine optimization, or they're talking about pricing, or they're talking about something that you're not that familiar with, you get it. I remember the time I was at this water color class in Spain.

The artist was showing us how to get these reflections of light on a rainy day. When he showed us he went through the steps. This is step one. This is step two. This is step three. I got it.
To continue reading, download the transcript

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